Sunday, June 14, 2009

Anybody have any cheese 'cause I'm bring the "whine"

Geesh. I didn't realize it had been so long since I blogged. I guess when you feel like you're not making any headway it's easy to put your weight loss blog on the back burner, huh?

I did get on the scale last Tuesday for my usual weekly weigh in and I was 123 which is still about the same, a little smidgeon less, than what I've been for... oh ... for EVER! I did tell myself though, I am going to lose at least one kilo this week. I don't know if it'll happen but at least I made a pseudo-rah-rah-you-can-do-it cheer in my head to try an uplift my spirits which seem to be on a rather long downward spiral to shitsville for the longest time now.

The closer my vacation to the US in September gets the more and more I know I need to drop some serious poundage to be able to do some ever more serious shopping for clothing but most of all I want my ample rear to be able to fit oh-so-comfy in the freaking bulkhead seats, which is where they place all parents with little ones as it's more "roomy". Of course if you have an ass the size of Texas you can barely squeeze yourself into the seat as the arms don't move up and within minutes your thighs are numb and you're feet are tingling from lack of bloodflow. Yeah, that's the way I want to spend my 8+ hour flight.

I tried doing some clothing shopping here the other day and I am in quite the "situation". My top half is still where I was pre-pregnancy but my lower half (a.k.a. Tex-ass) is two sizes bigger. I am not a person who tucks in their shirts because I'm just not comfortable that way being my size. I like my shirts to hit me about thigh length, not too short and not too long. Well in order to get my shirt around my un-small thighs without looking like a sausage I have to wear it two sizes too big on the top half of my body. This makes me look frumpy as hell and also leaves my shirt gaping open for the whole world to enjoy my boobage any time I bend the slightest bit over. I refuse to spend any sort of decent money on clothing because I am still holding onto the dream that I am going to lose this weight (again!) so it doesn't make sense in my head to pay more for tayloring than I paid for the entire article of clothing. Seriously though, I have one t-shirt that I can wear this summer and maybe 2 or 3 shirts that are office appropriate. I'm already sick of seeing myself in them and one of them needs ironed, which, as we all know good and well, ironing is the devil and I super suck at it. Thank God my office is super casual and I can get away with wearing just some t-shirts with jeans but I still have to find the t-shirt.

So I've freaking had it. I am losing this weight once and for all. I refuse to keep pansy-assing around. (Is pansy-assing a word because it felt really good to say it). Yeah, I'm exhausted from the baby still not sleeping through the night but I'm just going to have to deal with it in another, more healthy way.

I hope you are all doing well. I will try and post updates way more often as I know how it is to check a blog and not see an update day after day after day. Eventually you just quit checking!

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