Well yesterday one fit directly into my mouth. Not exactly my "plan" but not the end of the world either (although the dialogue in my head would tell you a different, bloodier, much more dramatic story ending with my head exploding into a million chocolate pieces while brownie batter drips from my neck stump where aforementioned head used to sit. Nicccccccce).
But where do brownies actually fit into my life? The answer may never truly be known. Am I a person who can have one brownie and leave it at that? Well, I did yesterday but it was a huge brownie (4 inch square probably an inch and a half thick) and I didn’t even think of getting a second. But that brownie yesterday can regurgitate itself at any moment, usually a moment of weakness, hours, days or weeks after I’ve eaten it. For instance, if I am back in the cafeteria and another brownie is sitting there, whispering my name seductively, will I say “Sarah, you had a brownie yesterday so that’s enough” or will I say “Sarah, you had a brownie yesterday so you may as well have another today”?
The obvious answer is choice number one, “I had one yesterday so of course that will hold me over” but I live in a real world (or at least it’s my reality), where I know I am not quite mentally stable with all-things-brownie (and sweet) related and I could very well talk myself out of passing it up and right back into the brownie driver’s seat. I can totally see myself saying “well you screwed up yesterday so what’s the point of trying”. And at that instant, that split second in time, that very wrong moment, that statement will actually make sense to me. When I talk about it now, not in a brownie trance, it seems silly, laughable even, but those moments of absolute craziness do happen to me, so what’s the best way to combat it?
If you’re expecting an answer here boy were you sadly mistaken. I don’t really know the answer or have some wise statement to make about how the brownie is really a reflection of ____ which can be interpreted as ____ or ____ which means I am _____, ______ and ______. My thoughts about brownies are the only thing leaving my mind _____. Yeah, I have some ideas about what I can do, what I should do, and how to defeat my sweet tooth monster but I’m not quite “there” with posting them at this second. I need to mill around a while. Let them swirl around in my head and maybe even test the waters. Then I’ll fill in the blanks for you (and for me!)
Enough about brownies! I didn't get to go on my lunch time walk yesterday (craptastic weather) but I am going to make up for it today. It's BEAUTIFUL out and I can't wait to get in the sun and get moving. I’m going to avoid the brownie section of the cafeteria because, well it just makes sense.
I hope you’re all having fantastic, healthy, successful weeks!
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edit: I DID go on a walk today at lunch for about 20-25 minutes and wow, am I out of shape. I can't believe I was up to running over a mile before and now I can hadrly walk without huffing anf puffing. It'll be easier tomorrow though. I remember what it was like when I first started running. At first I could only go a few feet (seriously, like 50 feet max) without having to stop but it was just a few days before I could go twice that far and so on. I'm pretty stoked.
Oh and I had a fabulous lunch of tomato bread with humous, shredded apple, shredded carrots, three dates and a couple slices of cheddar cheese with a banana and a diet coke.
2 comments:
Ok, so I have a tip for you on how you can control you sweet tooth.
In the last few years scientists have found out that a lot about sweet cravings, food cravings and the body holding on to weight are done through hormones.
People who have to lose a lot of weight, not just like 10 pounds, have been found to have much, much higher amounts of certain hormones which make it difficult to "think straight" when around certain foods.
But there are ways that you can control those hormones - eating complex carbs and one way which works really well for me: eating lots and lots of cinnamon. I start my day out with a home-brewed coffee and I put about one teaspoon of cinnamon into my coffee grounds before brewing. It tastes great and it made me train myself to not use sugar in my coffee (I do use 1 or 2% organic milk). I also put cinnamon in smoothies and whenever I think about it. I feel like I have been craving sweets a lot less since doing that.
Also, make sweets a treat. I don't eat sugar daily but if I go to a restaurant and I want to have desert I have it (I make my husband eat half of it though).
I think scientists are only now starting to find out a lot about the hormones issues and the research is slow because one thing they found out is that people who have weight loss surgery are cured of these hormonal problems immediately after the surgery which they think is because one of the hormone glands is removed along with the stomach. So anyway, I guess they are like "Well, if you can just cut it out, we don't have to find a way to control it". But not everybody wants surgery. I know I don't.
Oh, those tempting brownies! Keep away from them, pretend they are poison, tell yourself they have bugs in them, anything to keep you from eating them!
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