Monday, February 01, 2010

Isn't that the way it goes?

I just went to the little cafe we have in-house at work and got an orange, a snack bar (not a cookie and not a granola bar but I don't know what they'd be called in English, in Dutch they're Liga)(and I even checked the calories to make sure I wasn't getting more than I wanted) and went to pay. Nice, healthy afternoon snacks to get me through today until I am home.

I'm a pretty chatty person in general. It's the gift of gab I got from my Mom and I'll pretty much talk to a wall. I don't even need a response. So naturally, I am always chatty with everybody in the cafe and have a pretty decent report with the employees there. So sweet little Winnie, the girl working the counter today, thought she'd be nice and snuck an apple popover into my bag "free". I thanked her and said she didn't have to do that, you know, to be polite.

Oh, if she only knew how much I actually pay for the free apple popover and all of its sugary goodness! Why is it when I wanted free sugary snacks there were none to be found, "oh no you'll be PAYING for that!" Now on the day I pronounce my "new beginning", wearing my tights, cape and super hero mask, I have pastries shoved at me for free! Oh the quandary. Free apple popovers. These are one of my favorite pastries. Actually, I’ve yet to meet a pastry that I didn’t like. What’s a girl-turned-healthy to do?

I will admit I opened the package and nibbled the end. A very small nibble. Not even a mouthful.

I came to my desk and offered the thing to my neighbor. She didn't want it (skinny cow). She didn’t even think twice when answering me.

Then the conversation went a little something like this (in my head, none the less)

"I hate to waste food".

"You're still doing way better than you did yesterday, even if you do eat it".

"Yes, but I'm not eating crap. One "thing" leads to another".

"You can always eat it and start afterwards"

"But you already started, you can't quit and start and quit again... already... on the first day!"

"Nobody will know"

"That sugar looks yummy"

"Maybe just eat part"

"You can't eat part you moron, who are you fooling"

"Throw it away, the whole thing"

...and as I took a bite I continued to converse...

"what are you doing"

"not again"

"oh come ON!"

"Sarah Sarah Sarah Sarah Sarah"


"you're not even trying" I took a second, apple/sugar/pastry filled bite the banter carried on mindlessly...

"you know you can stop, just put the popover down... step away from the popover"

"you're soooo not going to put that thing down"

"you can do it. you can stop right now. you totally can stop"

"I can stop if I wanted to. Nobody is going to make me do it, I have to do it for myself"

"I really, really like it though"


"are you calling bullshit on me?"

"*sneezing* bullshit"

"dude, was that just a sneezing bullshit from 7th grade?"

"bbuuuuuullllllllllllllssssssshhhhhhiiiiiittttttt (sung in a high suprano as I pirouetted around in my super hero gear)"

"awww, what do you know anyway"

"I know bullshit when I see it"

so I did it. I threw the rest in the trash, two bites into it. Even as I tossed the thing away and never one to go down without a proper fight, my mind kept on wandering...

"how dirty is that trashcan?”

“freaking gross man”

“You're not going to pull a "George Kastanza with the eclaire" are you"

"ummm...hell no."

Hell no.


becklette said...

that's rough. i'm proud of you, though! whenever you stop-- before you bite, after two bites or before the last bite-- is a total triumph.

and i'm glad sadie's sleeping through the night.

AGirlWorthLosing said...

LOL, you are so funny! I have totally been there! Go you for not eating it all!

Erin said...

This was very entertaining to read as I'm sure we've all been there, lol. You, however, have way more willpower than I do because one bite would have done me in and I would have finished it. Strawberry, probably not. Same goes for cherry or blueberry. But apple? MMMMMM.....

Good for you!:)