American Candy YUM!

My co-worker was just in LA on business and she brought back American candy for all of us in the office. Not just candy... but Reeses Cups, Nestle Crunch Bars, Butterfingers and Baby Ruths. CHOCOLATE!!!!

Yes they have chocolate in the Netherlands. Hell we're right on top of Belgium who is world renowned for chocolate. They have excellent chocolate here, I've eaten my fair share (and your fair share too) but they don't have ANY of these chocolates and these chocolates are a little bit like home.

The candy bars are all micro-mini size, really just one bite but I cannot quit looking at them. They're sitting there all pretty, neatly packaged in their tiny bite size little wrappers in the big huge glass candy jar and they're staring at me. Right at me. When I walk in in the morning, there they are. When I need to get some of my files... they're sitting there. When somebody drops something in my inbox they're peeking at me from the corner of my eye. Sometimes I even hear them calling out my name.

Butterfinger (whispering): "Psst. Sarah... PSST. Sarah! Over here. Remember me?

I walk past not batting an eye.

Butterfinger: "oh no you di'int. I know you heard me. Saaaraaahhh. It's me... butterfinger.

I pass by again and give the candy jar the I'll-kill-you-if-my-name-ever-passes-your-lips-errr-you-probably-don't-have-lips- ok just shut up look!

Butterfinger (pleading): But Sarah... I'm crispity. I'm crunchity....come on... you know the rest.

I stop dead in my tracks and my head jerks slightly.

Butterfinger: Come on Sarah... I'm crispity. I'm crunchity.

I feel beads of sweat forming on my forehead and my hands are ever so slightly trembling. I may faint.

Butterfinger: Just finish the sentence for me just this one little time... pweeeeeze? Just for me... Come on...I'm crispity. I'm crunchity...

Me (yelling...and drooling): You're butterfingery! You're Butterfinger!!!! Aaa!!!!!!

I rip the lid off the jar and stick my hands in like a child at Halloween grabbing fistfuls of the little treats. I plop down on the floor as I fumble with the first wrapper stuffing those bite size chocolates in my face so fast I actually ate a wrapper or two. My colleagues looked on in horror. I was ravenous!

And then I'm snapped back into reality by the phone ringing or something else as utterly annoying.

Ok so it never happens quite like this but God those stupid chocolates drive me crazy sitting there.

I really proves to me how making your environment as non-fail as possible is such a very important step in this whole process. If it's not there you can't eat it plain and simple. I don't bring chocolate or candies or anything that I just cannot resist to my house anymore (cake, oreos, ice cream, full fat cream cheese). It was one of the first steps I took in this whole journey, to throw out all the junk. At the time I thought it was a baby step, a minor thing, but I realize now how big this step actually is. It's so very important that you set yourself up for success. Sitting at work every day looking at that huge candy jar full of candy that I really do love is killing me.

I do have a chocolate from the jar every day. Sometimes even two. I'm not super human. I eat these little bitty bite size chocolates and I don't let myself feel guilty. If I didn't eat them then the dramatization I wrote above could very well come true. They'll be gone soon. I won't cry when I say goodbye.