Monday, June 30, 2008

Confession: I'm addicted!

Since being home on maternity leave, and actually this addiction stems well before I even dreamed about being a Mommy, I've had some spare time in the mornings to turn on the TV and chill out a little. As I flip throught the channels I always seem to wind up on the same (or similar) shows...

THE INFOMERCIAL!

I am so addicted to watching informecials and my fingers are just itching to dial the phone and order one of everything. The most recent infomercials that have captured my heart, although not yet my money, are the H2o Mop, the Sheer Cover Make-up and the Ped Egg.

The H2O Mop... what an item! It mops, it steams, it cleans the carpets, it dries the floor, it does hardwood...all without using any smelly and expensive chemicals! Throw away your closet full of mops, buckets, brooms, scrub brushes... toss it all out! Never rent a professional steamer again! The only machine you need is a H2O mop all for the low low price of ______ (I have no idea). Now I will admit I don't actually HAVE a room full of buckets, mops, scrub brushes, etc. I don't even have a mop. I have a Swiffer sweeper to get up the Scooter hair and dust (which I will confess to LOVING!) and then we wash the floors old school... on our hands and knees with a simple rag and some water. I also only have a very small area where this is necessary (the hall, the toilet, shower room and part of the kitchen) and these are generally kept clean anyway. We don't wear shoes in the house, we have a runner down the entire hall and well, we're just not that dirty I guess but oh how I want to be a proud owner of the H2O mop!

Now I can count the number of times I've slapped some make-up on my face this year on one hand. Possibly on one finger. I just can't be bothered to put make up on every single day. I'm not one of those women who needs a little mascara before stepping out the door. I'll confess to owning tons of Mary Kay make-up and I do LOVE to put it on because I have fun cool expensive brushes that go with it all but honestly it's such a pity for me to spend so much money on make up that should be tossed out. So why in the world am I DYING to order Sheer Cover Make-up? Because Melissa Gilbert uses it and so does the winner of season two of America's Next Top Model (although she doesn't have a speaking part in the commerical, I'm pretty sure it's Yoanna). Apparently Melissa has horrible skin and just loves this make up witch makes her look fabulous... like a movie star I dare say. And Yoanna apparently needs this same coverage for her ANTM face. In this informercial they take old women with spider veins and cover them right up before your eyes! (the veins, not the women) They make people who have birthmarks, freckles, pimples, bags...whatever it is you have... they cover it! Amazing! So what if I don't really have anything much to cover up... the fact is that I can mix my color to match my skin (does it come in pale-as-a-brit's-ass-in-the-dead-of-winter because I'm fairly certain that's the "shade" I am?) and just tap the brush and voila, I look like a million bucks! I want this make up and I want it now!

And lastly but definately not least... the Ped Egg. It's the cheese grater for your feet! And actually I watch this informercial not really with the longing to OWN a Ped Egg but more in shock and disgust for the feet that they showcase on the commercial. Who in the world has feet that look like that?! I can't even begin to imagine how long you must go without touching your foot with any sort of water, cloth or exfoliator to get a foot as scaley as these tootsies on the TV. And the fact that they catch all of the foot shavings in this handy dandy little Ped Egg just scares me. I can just see this little magic machine turning into a practical joke at some poor unsuspecting souls expense. Freshly grated parmesean? Ugh.

I just cannot seem to turn these shows off. I think it's best that I just don't turn the television on at all some days because before I know it 3 hours have passed and my hands are trembling to dial the phone... if I call NOW I can get the free gift! It's FREE!

I know some of you must also be informecial junkies (Keith I know you're one!) and can be sympathetic for my pathetic addiction... but what I really want to know is... which of you own these three items and how much do you LOVE them!

4 comments:

~Jess said...

I avoid the tv because it is such a drain on time (and money).

I do own the Bare Essentials (sephora) powder makeup (not quite the same). I don't own a Ped egg, but I do own a foot thing that is very similar to that.

Enjoy your maternity leave :-)

lifeshouldbestereo said...

ughh.. the ped egg? That truly sounds disgusting!

Erin said...

Lol...this post was funny! I've seen the same infomercial again and again, yet some how I still stop to watch it when I'm bored silly on a Sunday morning: The Magic Bullet. A spiffy blender-type thing that makes *everything* and does it so neatly and in one container! The thing that bugs me about it? The old lady (with the cigarette dangling from her hand or mouth) who looks like she literally rolled out of bed and came down to party in the kitchen with the rest of the group. She sits right up to the counter (and near the food) while all this cooking fun is going on.

I'm also intrigued by the Sheer Cover, but can't bring myself to justify ordering it when I have a drawer full of makeup already:)

Anonymous said...

i don't know about the others, but the pedegg is fantastic!! it seems weird and all, a cheese grater for your feet, but it's actually a great product. i bought it after a lot of girls on the nest recommended it. give it a try, you won't be disappointed :)